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Source of Grief

Posted on April 18, 2012 by Family Christian There have been 0 comments

“When Esau was forty years old, he married Judith daughter of Beeri the Hittite, and also Basemath daughter of Elon the Hittite. They were a source of grief to Isaac and Rebekah. Genesis 26:34-35

 

Sometimes a child becomes a source of grief because they choose to marry someone who does not meet their parent’s approval. In fact, the more the mom and dad express their disapproval the more adamant the child becomes in dismissing his parent’s wishes. When relational equity is overdrawn the opportunity to influence another vanishes for a season. This season of distress and disagreement can permanently scar a family. 

So, someone has to be mature in the face of immaturity. Even when we are insulted and rejected by an impetuous young adult with our same last name, we are obligated by God’s grace to rise above demanding our own way. Disowning (real or perceived) is not an option for a family full of love and forgiveness. Yes, rejection is painful—in the same way the Holy Spirit grieves over our unwise choices, so we grieve over our foolish child.

“See that no one is sexually immoral, or is godless like Esau, who for a single meal sold his inheritance rights as the oldest son. Afterward, as you know, when he wanted to inherit this blessing, he was rejected. Even though he sought the blessing with tears, he could not change what he had done.” Hebrews 12:16-17

Furthermore, here is a tender word of wisdom to adult children: honor your parents by asking their concerns over the person you love, whom you may desire to marry. Yes, you have the power to fill their hearts with joy by including them in your prayerful process, or you can drive a dagger into their hearts by rejecting their advice, just to spite them. Marriage is your decision under God and under the authority of your father and mother. Grief generated out of youthful foolishness is a relational plague to people bound by blood.

Lastly, look to your own heart and consider how you may have hurt your parents or wounded your son or daughter. Be intentional in building conversational bridges by seeking to understand and value their interests. Pray more and judge less, lest love gets lost in the confusing equation of shame plus blame. Forgiveness is the fuel that reignites a family’s love for one another. Humble yourself first and watch the grace of God work wonders!

“Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” Hebrews 12:14-15

Prayer: How can I honor my parents in my decision-making process? How can I relationally invest in my adult child?

Related Readings: 1 Samuel 20:34; Isaiah 63:10; Romans 9:13; Hebrews 11:20

Post/Tweet this today: When relational equity is overdrawn the opportunity to influence another vanishes. #invest #relationally


This post was posted in Daily Devotion

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