User Archives: Lysa TerKeurst

Lysa TerKeurst

"And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like the pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him." Matthew 6:7-8 (NIV)

Recently, I was studying what causes people to feel spiritually frustrated. The two top reasons? Bible study and prayer. I get it.

I clearly remember being a young girl sitting in church sweating. People around me knew what they were doing! They instantly flipped to every verse in the Bible the preacher man referenced. But not me. I was more interested in counting the spit droplets that came flying out with his punctuated words.

I respected that man. But boy, could he get fired up and entertain this lost girl.

Others seemed all wrapped up and excited in what this preacher man and the Bible had to say. They'd shout loud, "Uh-huhs" and "Amens!" What was I missing?

And then there was my prayer life. Or the lack thereof. It's not that I didn't want to pray, but the whole concept of talking to God felt strange. I tried to copy the prayers of those who seemed to know they were doing more than talking to the air.

But then my quirky self would sneak in and leave me feeling foolish for what I'd just said to God. "Dear Lord, take this food to the nourishment of my body. (Good so far.) And if you could change the molecular structure of these cheesy fries to be like carrot sticks that sure would be the bomb-diggity." (Huh?)

Yes, I've come a long way since those days, but trust me when I say I'm still a work in progress. You could still trip me up in finding certain passages in the Bible. And I'm pretty sure you might still hear me say "bomb-diggity" in my prayers. But according to what Jesus taught in our key verse, Matthew 6:7-8, I think He's okay with that.

"And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like the pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him."

For me, there are two keys to unlocking spiritual frustration with both my Bible study and my prayers:

Sincerity — coming to God without an agenda and honestly wanting Him to teach me.

Simplicity — talking to God as the loving Father He is.

Why do we make it all so complicated?

I think honest moments spent with God reading His Word, sharing our hearts, and listening for His instruction are quite perfect. No "just right" words or having to know exactly where every book in the Bible is. Just a pure heart simply and sincerely longing to know her God. Jesus might even say that's the bomb-diggity.

Dear Lord, thank You for hearing what is on my heart in the midst of both happiness and frustration. I don't want to make my relationship with You complicated, God, so please help me to come to You with honest thoughts and prayers. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Did this devotion speak to you right where you are? If so, check out Lysa TerKeurst's book Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl for more encouragement as you deepen your relationship with God.

Click here to follow us on our Facebook page.

Reflect and Respond:
Have you been feeling spiritually frustrated lately?

Take some time today to have an honest conversation with the Lord. It may even help you to first write down what you want to pray about, reflect on it, and then lift your prayers up to Him.

Power Verses:
Psalm 4:1, "Answer me when I call to you, my righteous God. Give me relief from my distress; have mercy on me and hear my prayer." (NIV)

Psalm 145:18, "The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath and from doing as you please on my holy day, if you call the Sabbath a delight and the Lord's holy day honorable, and if you honor it by not going your own way and not doing as you please or speaking idle words, then you will find your joy in the Lord." Isaiah 58:13-14a (NIV)

Rest.

That sounds so good, but it's really difficult for a girl like me. Even when my physical body is at rest, my mind rarely is.

I feel like I'm always juggling balls in my brain. Kids' needs. Home demands. Work projects. The to-do lists never stop.

Yet the Bible makes it very clear that we are to honor the Sabbath day and pursue rest. Literally we are to hit the pause button on life once a week and guard our need to rest. Guard it fiercely. Guard it intentionally. Guard it even if our schedules beg us to do otherwise.

But why?

There are honest, personal reasons we need to observe the Sabbath that will be unique for each person. There are private conversations we need to have with God. We all need to pause, to sit with God, and ask Him to reveal some things to us.

And when I consider our key verse Isaiah 58:13-14a, something occurs to me—it's not just a day for me to give to God. It's a day God established for me. He wants to give me something if only I'll slow down enough to receive it.

"If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath and from doing as you please on my holy day, if you call the Sabbath a delight and the LORD's holy day honorable, and if you honor it by not going your own way and not doing as you please or speaking idle words, then you will find your joy in the LORD."

The Sabbath isn't merely a time to be observed; it's a time to be preserved. It's a time to rediscover our joy in the Lord.

I need this. I want to be a preserver of this day—one who is determined to protect this day of personal preservation and rediscover the delight of God.

The observer remembers to rest.

The preserver rests to remember—to remember that it's all about God.

The observer remembers to rest and pause on the Sabbath day in order to follow a rule.

The preserver does more than follow a rule. She follows God's desire and embraces His purpose in the rest. She spends one day a week letting the fresh wind of God's rest blow through her, cleaning out all she's been taking in during the week with a purifying soul exhale.

It's all about pausing and connecting with God without the distracting chaos of our everyday routines. For one day a week, we step out of the fray and let God direct our day according to His rhythm, not ours.

God's rhythm preserves a space in us to hear His voice, reveals the places we're off track, and prevents us from being filled with unnecessary clutter. Quiet rest allows us to see the places where we're going our own way, the areas where we're more self-pleasing than God-pleasing, the idle words that need to be reined in. During the down time, we can deal with the mental clutter and focus on the ways of God.

The Sabbath makes this possible.

Taking one day for rest gives my soul the freedom it so desperately needs. Freedom to breathe. Space to breathe. Inhaling and exhaling in a gentle rhythm set by God.

Dear Lord, space to breathe, this is what I need today. Thank You for showing me how important it is to create a place for freedom and rest. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

Related Resources:
For more encouragement and practical advice on creating a place to exhale in the midst of raw emotions check out Lysa TerKeurst's book Unglued.

The accompanying Unglued Bible study will help you understand what the Bible says about better ways to react. To order your copy, click here.

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Reflect and Respond:
Take a moment to think about your own practices for rest and reflection on the Sabbath.

What can you do to hit "pause" and spend some time with the Lord this week? It could be taking a break from your to-do list, committing to spend some time journaling, etc.

Power Verses:
Hebrews 4:9-10, "There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God's rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his." (NIV)

Psalm 62:1, "Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." Deuteronomy 11:18-19 (NIV)

Early in my motherhood adventure I realized I could solve my kids' problems for them. Not every problem. But for the most part when they had an issue I could step in and be the solution.

Or ...

I had another option. I could mentor and equip my kids to solve their issues. This approach is much more time consuming, brain draining, and sometimes quite frustrating.

But for me, the most important lesson I want to teach my kids is how to think.

It's that whole "give a man a fish" thing. Give him a fish and he'll eat for a day ... or teach him to fish and he'll eat for a lifetime.

I don't want to train my children to always turn to me for solutions. I want them to learn to think in biblically and emotionally healthy ways and process life's choices in grounded, mature ways. Eventually, they will become solution finders.

If I only tell my kids what they can and can't do, I'm establishing rules for them to follow. This is a part of parenting for sure, but it can't be the whole part.

If I teach them how to think, I'm establishing healthy processing patterns that will serve them when they're no longer under my immediate watch.

For example, texting while driving is deadly. I've taught them this rule. But to help them learn to process the dangers of driving while distracted, I decided to have a family discussion.

Recently, I asked each of the kids to come to a scheduled family dinner equipped to present a brief report on the dangers of texting and driving.

As they presented their reports, I saw the light bulbs coming on in their thought processes. They weren't just learning a rule; they were discovering how to think about this dangerous habit. They were passionate about it. And the best part? They independently committed to not text and drive.

They owned it. Not because I preached a rule at them. But rather, because I helped them learn how to think through this danger for themselves.

The Bible instructs us to teach our kids the truths of God by talking and processing with them all throughout the day. Obviously, texting and driving isn't a biblical truth, but how powerful it is to apply a Biblical mindset to every issue we face.

So, be it a Scriptural truth or processing life stuff in general, I think the secret is tucked within the beautiful words of our key verse, Deuteronomy 11:18-21 (NIV):

"Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, so that your days and the days of your children may be many..."

Yes, may our days together be many. Learning. Thinking. And processing each problem through the filter of God's Truth.

Dear Lord, thank You for the opportunity to teach my children how to think in a way that is honoring to You. Use me as an example of Your love and compassion in their lives. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Equip your daughter or a young woman you know to think in biblically and emotionally healthy ways with Lysa TerKeurst's new book, What Happens When Young Women Say Yes to God, co-written with her teenage daughter Hope. Click here to purchase your copy.

Reflect and Respond:
How can you begin to implement this way of thinking with your family?

Start small – direct your child to Scripture, say a prayer with him/her, or make it an overall family discussion!

Power Verses:
Proverbs 22:6, "Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it." (NIV)

Isaiah 54:13, "All your children will be taught by the Lord, and great will be their peace." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:4 (ESV)

I am a magnet for strange.

Seriously.

A few years ago I was outside with my three dogs soaking up the sunshine. We had gotten a new puppy named "Willow" for Christmas. Well, our other dogs, Champ and Chelsea, weren't sure what to think of precious, little three-pound, Willow.

She annoyed them. In every way.

I thought it would be a good investment for the dog relations in our home if I spent time with them outside, to help them all feel the love. So, I sat on the ground and loved on each dog.

They enveloped me in a flurry of wet kisses, fur, and stinky dog breath. I was having a ball. And they were all getting along. Bliss.

Until ... Willow came and sat on my lap. Claiming the prized location of closeness with me, I don't think she realized the signal she was sending. Champ suddenly backed up and growled. His tail stopped wagging. And he was not happy.

"Oh Champ," I reassured him, "Willow is a baby. Be nice."

More growling.

"No sir! Champ, be nice. Come here. I can love on you while Willow sits in my lap," I reassured him once more, while rubbing behind his ears.

He seemed to be happy again, and licked my cheek.

More bliss.

But then, out of the blue, he walked beside me, looked straight at Willow, lifted his leg, and drenched me in tee-tee!

What in the world!? I couldn't believe what was happening.

After recovering from my shock and changing my clothes, I Googled it.

Some articles I read said Champ was marking his territory. "That's MY mama!"

His strong expression of "MINE" was a vivid reminder of just how disgusting a heart bent on self can be. Champ couldn't enjoy all he was experiencing in the moment, because he was so laser-focused on the one way he felt slighted.

SELFishness! ME! MINE! MINE! MINE!

Sadly, I recognize this behavior because I've demonstrated this behavior.

Several years ago, God challenged me to recognize my selfishness by seeing—really seeing—all that I've been given. And never looking at a blessing as something just for me. Now, I make myself think two things ...

1. Thank You God for entrusting this blessing to me. I know it is a gift from You.

2. How can I use this as an opportunity to bless someone else? The blessing will be more rewarding if it's not all about me.

Do these things come naturally? Not at first. Not in a "Me First, Mine!, Mine!, Tee-Tee on Others" kind of world.

But we aren't called to live according to the norm, just doing what comes naturally.

We are called to rise above. Be set apart. Be different. Be pure in every way. "All who have this hope in him purify themselves, just as he is pure" (1 John 3:3 NIV).

What blessing do you have that might need to be shared today? What blessing do I have that might need to be shared today?

Right in the midst of what we're doing, how can we graciously and purely represent Christ as we RE-present Him everywhere we go?

Good stuff to ponder as I washed my smelly outfit that day.

Dear Lord, thank You for every good and perfect gift You have given me. Help me to put others before me and to have a heart to see them as You do. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

If this devotion resonated with you, you'll enjoy Lysa's book, What Happens When Women Say Yes to God. For more information, click here.

Reflect and Respond:
What opportunity has been given to you recently that you can pass on to others?

Will you take the initiative to do that today?

Power Verses:
Philippians 2:3, "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves." (NIV)

Romans 12:3, "For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you." (NIV)

Psalm 133:1, "How good and pleasant it is when God's people live together in unity!" (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." Galatians 5:6b (NIV)

My daughter Hope is one of those people who knows how to dress.

She'll put on a blue and white striped shirt, throw on an army jacket and black pants, finish the look with brown ankle boots and look like a fashionista.

Me on the other hand, I get all stuck in a "Garanimals" state of mind. Did you ever wear Garanimals, the pants and shirts that match perfectly? It made me resistant to the delight of the unexpected.

Matchy-matchy became the curse of my closet.

Until Hope set me straight one day. "Mom, your outfits need a little pop!"

Pop?

She started whipping my outfits together in a way I'd never dreamed.

An orange necklace with an outfit that had not a stitch of orange.

Huh?

Leopard flats with a dark blue shirt, teal necklace, and black skinny jeans.

Are you sure?

She was more than sure. With great confidence she introduced me to the world of adding a pop-a little something unexpected. A new way of expressing myself. And it has been delightful.

So, I started thinking, what if I did this with other areas of my life? Other places where I've slipped into the "same old, same old" ruts.

Might the delight of the unexpected make other aspects of my life more fun?

Our key verse Galatians 5:6b says, "The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love."

Might this be an invitation to discover another new way to express myself? Express my faith? Through acts of love?

Yes. I think so.

So, I did a little experiment. I started reading Bible verses by adding on a little question/challenge to myself at the end: "... so that I can love who?"

For example, Romans 12:2a, "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind" (NIV) ... so that I can love who?

There is someone in my life who needs my love but I'll only be able to do it if I let God change my mindset. I need to add this little pop - a new expression of my faith through love.

Philippians 4:19, "And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus" (NIV) ... so that I can love who?

There is someone in my life who needs something that I don't think I can give. My time. An emotional investment. A financial gift. Things I sometimes feel are in limited supply. But I can freely give those things when I realize God supplies all of my needs. I just have to open my hand and send some of my blessing in this person's direction. I need to add this little pop - a new expression of my faith through love.

Why not try this yourself? No, not the leopard flats and teal necklace ... although that is quite the charming combination. But rather adding the question, "... so that I can love who?" to the end of the verses you read today.

It will certainly give you a new way to express your faith. A way that God says is the only thing that counts.

Dear Lord, thank You for showing me how to express my faith in a fresh way. Help me to love others with the same love and compassion You so freely lavish upon me. You are my rock and my redeemer. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Is there a young woman in your life who could use a fresh way to look at her faith? Check out Lysa TerKeurst's new book What Happens When Young Women Say Yes to God, co-written with her teenage daughter Hope. Filled with interactive sections and ways to get into God's Word, this book will leave any young woman feeling encouraged and equipped for her walk with the Lord. Click here to purchase your copy!

Reflect and Respond:
Who can you love today?

Choose someone to really bless. Commit to pray for and reach out to that person often. Do things that will make them feel loved. For example, surprise a friend with her favorite coffee drink one morning.

Power Verses:
Ephesians 5:1-2, "Follow God's example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." (NIV)

1 John 4:7-8, "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?" Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 (NIV)

What makes a woman tender also reveals her vulnerabilities.

What makes a woman transparent also exposes her wounds.

What makes a woman authentic also uncovers her insecurities.

And there aren't many women who enjoy being revealed, exposed, and uncovered. But establishing real intimacy with another person requires pushing past the resistance—past the fear.

Friendship is risky.

To be known is to risk being hurt. But friendship can be beautiful, and worth the risk.

We can look to the Bible for examples of monumental friendships. In 1 Samuel 18 we learn about the special friendship between David and Jonathan, an example of a true bond. When Jonathan's father, King Saul, threatened David with death, Jonathan risked his position in his father's household and warned his friend.

Jonathan and David's friendship lasted their lifetime, and because of Jonathan's loyalty to David, the Lord blessed them both. David eventually became king, but by then Jonathan had died. David inquired, "'Is there anyone still left of the house of Saul to whom I can show kindness for Jonathan's sake?'" (2 Samuel 9:1b NIV).

Don't miss this beauty: it was customary for the present king to put to death any of the former king's family. However, because of his and Jonathan's strong friendship, King David tenderly provided for Jonathan's son. "I will restore to you all the land that belonged to your grandfather Saul, and you will always eat at my table" (2 Samuel 9:7b NIV). "So Mephibosheth ate at David's table like one of the king's sons" (2 Samuel 9:11b NIV).

Awesome. Inspiring. Friendship.

Yes, friendship is beautiful. The Lord gave it to us. He knew we would need each other to get through this life.

Think about a friend you can make an investment in.

Not the friend with whom you feel most comfortable. But rather one who might benefit from seeing a little more of your tenderness, transparency, and authenticity. Someone who might be worth a risk.

Someone in your sphere of influence is desperate to know someone else understands.

Might we take three steps and give ourselves a friendship challenge? Here are three things you can do to invest in a friend:

1) Have a conversation with her in which you honestly admit one of your vulnerabilities. Chances are she'll reveal something to you as well. Then really commit to pray for her. Maybe wear a watch or bracelet and every time you're distracted by it, use this as a prompt to carry her burden in your prayers.

2) Buy or make this friend a gift. Just because. It doesn't have to cost much. But make an investment of time to think of something that would personally delight her.

3) Write your friend a note to attach to the gift. In the letter, tell her at least three things you admire about her and some way she's made a difference in your life.

Then deliver this little "just because" gift and note to your friend. This friend who sometimes feels a little vulnerable. Wounded. Exposed in some way.

Your honesty and thoughtfulness will be such a sweet investment.

For her.

For you.

For your friendship.

Are you up for taking the friendship challenge?

Dear Lord, thank You for all of the friendships and beautiful blessings You have placed in my life. Help me to see this challenge as a sweet reminder to show Your love to those around me. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

For more on how to maintain strong, healthy friendships through clear and honest communication, check out Lysa TerKeurst's new book, Unglued: Making Wise Choices In the Midst of Raw Emotions.

Reflect and Respond:
Write down the name of the friend or friends you chose for the friendship challenge. Don't wait until later. Your friend will thank you!

Power Verses:
Proverbs 17:17, "A friend loves at all times ..." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

from Hope TerKeurst

"You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love." Galatians 5:13 (NIV)

My two sisters and I always wanted brothers.

Prayed for brothers.

Begged our parents for brothers.

So when the decision was made to adopt two boys from Africa, my sisters and I were in awe the miracle was happening! Our mom and dad assured us it was real and God was behind it all—He had tugged at their hearts, He had prepared these boys and our family, and He had called us all to say "yes."

Our saying yes to God as a family to adopt our brothers made me want to say yes to Him in all areas of my life.

That's when I promised God my life would be His mission field and I'd be sold out to serving anywhere He sent me.

When I was 14 years old, I went on my first mission trip to Nicaragua. I fell in love with the whole experience. Even though I had happily said yes, the trip was difficult. I was totally outside my comfort zone. But any initial craziness and chaos gave way to great joy and peace.

The following summer I went to Ethiopia where I got to see a different way of life on the other side of the world. I experienced jitters being in a foreign land with a language, culture, and food I didn't understand, but the adjustment time was short and my passion grew great.

Since that trip I have taken several more to Nicaragua, including one where I helped run a foot-and-shoe clinic. We welcomed everyone who visited the clinic, washed their feet, prayed for them, and then helped them choose a pair of shoes. It was incredibly humbling to serve the people from these two countries.

They are grateful for their lives. Very few have anything of material value, yet their gratitude and joy flows without ceasing. They laugh, sing, dance, and give generously without holding back ... even to a stranger like me. I went to give. Yet, I was the one who received.

I've found that when I say yes to God, a joy fills me and motivates me to be close to Him and to walk in His will. It makes me want to keep asking Him how He can use my life as a mission field, any where from my home to my hometown to around the world.

We don't have to go overseas to do missions work. Opportunities are all around. Who has God placed in front of you that needs help? Who in your family needs support? Which friend has been struggling with a temptation or a broken heart?

When God works through us to meet the needs of others—that's missions.

Let's turn our everyday life into God's mission field. I think we'll be amazed at what He does as we step out of our comfort zone and partner with Him!

Dear Lord, I want You to use me to love and bless someone today. Show me exactly how I can serve Your people, even if it's in the smallest way. I'm trusting You to move in my heart and in the hearts of those around me. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Do you know a young woman who needs to be equipped and encouraged in her relationship with God? Read more about Hope TerKeurst's (Lysa TerKeurst's oldest daughter) journey of radical obedience as a teenager in What Happens When Young Women Say Yes to God, co-written together. Click here to purchase your copy!

Reflect and Respond:
How can you bless those around you? Turn your everyday life into a mission field!

Think about your job, your relationships, and your interactions with others as extraordinary opportunities to serve someone else.

Power Verses:
Ephesians 2:10, "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." (NIV)

Taken from What Happens When Young Women Say Yes to God © Copyright 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst and Hope TerKeurst. Published by Harvest House Publishers Eugene, OR. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

© 2013 by Hope TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." Matthew 5:44 (NIV)

Do you want to make Jesus smile today? I do.

I want to untangle the thoughts of me and mine and what I have going on and think of someone else. A friend. A neighbor. A stranger.

I want to give her the gift of my words. Words formed because I thought of her. And those thoughts culminated into a compelling reason to show love to her.

But, I'm not talking about someone who is easy to love.

I'm saying I'll give this gift to someone who has hurt me, judged me, wronged me, or flat out offended me. Yes, that's the one to whom the gift should go.

To do so, we must dare ourselves to get intentional with this command from Scripture. "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse" (Romans 12:14 NIV). And to pray.

Pray for an authentic heart while seeking to love this person. Not that we welcome that person into our inner circle and do daily life with her. But, offering love to those who hurt us, when most would scorn or ignore them, is beautiful and rare.

Dare to pray for an overwhelming sense of love. Not love for the difficult or hurtful situation that has arisen with this person, but love for the soul God created within them. She is His. He loves her. He treasures her even when He doesn't approve of her actions.

He treasures us even when He doesn't approve of our actions.

In the midst of giving what we might perceive as an undeserved gift of love to them, I wonder if our eyes might be opened to a different perspective. If we might see something we desperately need to see. About her. About ourselves. About our Jesus.

When someone says something ugly about me I need to consider the source. Wouldn't it be wonderful if a person receiving an undeserved gift of love from me, considered the source? And saw not me, but Jesus that reigns inside of me.

"When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized they were ordinary, unschooled men, they were astonished and took note that these men had been with Jesus" (Acts 4:13 NIV).

Oh, let it be so noted with my life ... my words ... my love for those who love me ... and even more, my love for those who don't. I have been with Jesus. I love like He loves. Because He is the source of all love.

And I do believe He smiles about that.

Dear Lord, You are worthy to be praised! I pray today that You will give me a heart that seeks to bless others, even if they have wronged me. Help me to genuinely forgive them, for You have extended so much grace to me. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
In her New York Times best-selling book, Unglued, Lysa TerKeurst speaks very honestly about how to have better reactions and improve relationships. Click here to order your copy.

Reflect and Respond:
Who could you give the gift of love to today?

Come to the Lord in prayer and ask for an overwhelming love of that person's soul. Be prepared for a perspective change as God shows you more about your own heart in this situation.

Power Verses:
Luke 6:27-31, "But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you. (NIV)

Romans 12:14, "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse," (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans." Proverbs 16:3 (NIV)

Fourteen years ago I was stuck in a rut of want. There was an opportunity that looked so promising. A publisher expressed genuine interest in my writing. It seemed to be right. It felt right. I wanted it to be right. It must be right!

But it never came to pass.

In my most mature moments I reasoned, "It wasn't meant to be. I trust God and believe in His perfect plans."

In my not-so-mature moments I wondered, "God, this isn't fair. Why do You keep saying no?"

And in my immature moments I whined, "God, do You care this hurts me?"

Have you ever been there?

Ruts of want are tough places to be stuck.

When God says no, we are sometimes tempted to wonder if He loves us. In reality, it's because He loves us, He sometimes says no.

Read that last sentence again and rub it into your heart. The hurting part. The part that throbs and aches when you see others getting the exact opportunity you want. You fake a smile to hide the pain.

God brought this change of perspective to me through a baking disaster that happened to my youngest daughter Brooke. She came to me at 9 o'clock one night and asked if she and her friend could bake a cake.

Hope, Brooke's older sister, had offered to help and I was too tired to argue the incessant pleas of a nine-year-old.

So, the girls began to bake.

Brooke measured and poured, whipped and stirred, and carefully placed a batter-filled cake pan into the oven. Then she turned on the oven light and watched the cake bake. Her cake became her whole focus. She couldn't stop looking at the cake and grew increasingly impatient with the slow-passing minutes on the timer.

Nothing kills patience like solely focusing on the object of your desire. And tragically, impatience becomes the breeding ground for compromise.

About 30 minutes into the 45-minute baking time, the cake looked done. It smelled done. Brooke and her friend wanted it to be done. She reasoned it must be done!

Hope helped retrieve the cake and placed it on the counter to cool.

And it wasn't long until the cake imploded.

The cake couldn't withstand the pressure of an undone center ... and neither can we.

If we obsess over the cake and make it our whole focus, character atrophies. If we make growing in godliness our obsession and keep our focus on God, our character matures. And a mature character makes for a solid and well-done center.

I thank God every day for every "no" He has graciously allowed and continues to allow in my life. Our key verse Proverbs 16:3 teaches, "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans." Through placing my focus on God, I have embraced His plans for me, and I trust that a "no" from Him is really a blessing.

I used to pray, "God, let me, let me, let me!"

I now pray, "God, please never let my success outgrow the character necessary to handle it."

Indeed, it's because God loves us, He sometimes says no.

Dear Lord, although I don't always understand, thank You for saying "no." I know that You do so as a measure of protection for me. Help me to embrace Your best for my life, Father. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Is there a young woman in your life who is striving for God to be the center of her focus? Lysa TerKeurst's new book What Happens When Young Women Say Yes to God, co-written with her teenage daughter Hope, would make a wonderful gift! Click here to purchase your copy.

Sometimes a "no" from God can make us feel like we'll unravel. For help in navigating these emotions, check out Lysa's book Unglued by clicking here.

Reflect and Respond:
What "no" have you thanked God for lately?

Soak in the truths of our key verse and power verses. Then, think about instances in the past where a "no" from God has really been a blessing in disguise. Use these tools in an area of your life that needs reminding of His faithfulness now.

Power Verses:
Psalm 31:14-15a, "But I trust in you, LORD; I say, 'You are my God.' My times are in your hands." (NIV)

Proverbs 16:9, "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org

Lysa TerKeurst

"You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water." Psalm 63:1 (NIV)

I'm taking a break from having a quiet time. Because sometimes I can get in a rut. Even with good things. And having a daily quiet time is a good thing. Until it becomes more about routine than actually connecting with God.

When God becomes routine rather than revival, it's time to switch things up.

Otherwise, I might start seeing this time as less important. It becomes the second or third thing I do. After other things. Seemingly more pressing things. Before I know it, it's been days since I connected privately and personally with Truth.

And then my soul feels a bit off and sluggish. Like when my stomach has been denied food, a desperation starts creeping over other parts of my body. That happens with soul hunger too.

Only the triggers for stomach hunger are much more apparent. My brain quickly reminds me, "You feel awful because you need to eat."

Sometimes my brain isn't as quick to pick up on soul hunger. So I just lumber forward but wonder, "What's wrong?" I think of a list of reasons ... I'm tired, I haven't had enough fun, or my butt looks big in these jeans.

And while some of those things may be true—it's not why I feel off.

I need more time with God.

Not more quiet time.

More listening time. Like the writer in Psalm 63:1 needed. "You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek You; I thirst for You, my whole being longs for You, in a dry and parched land where there is no water." (NIV)

This morning as I sat with God with nothing but willingness to listen, three things popped into my mind. I can't say "God spoke to me" but it felt right. I need to do some new things as I listen.

Study wisdom by reading a chapter in Proverbs everyday.
Ask God to reveal "my verse" for the day and think of ways to apply it. I listen.

Read something from someone I admire.
I need to study leadership in this season of my life. So, I pick up a book written on this topic by someone I admire and glean from their wisdom. I listen.

Read something from someone I trust.
There's a book I'm reading right now that is whimsical and grounded all at the same time. It makes me feel like this writer gets me. They get my struggles and offer up advice I know I can trust. I listen.

Maybe you think all this still sounds like a quiet time, but to me it's different. It's a listening time. A time to shake things up a bit and get outside my normal routine. A time to listen to God speak. And He does speak ... through His book of wisdom, through someone I admire, and through someone I trust.

And this morning? My soul felt that thrilling and comforting full feeling. Complete. Satisfied. Deeply nourished.

Dear Lord, I'm seeking to grow a stronger relationship with You today. Help me to break out of the routine so that I can connect with You and hear You speak. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
It's important to exchange whispers with God before shouts with the world. In the just released Unglued Devotional, Lysa TerKeurst shares practical ways of capturing meaningful time with the Lord.

And if you missed Lysa's New York Times bestselling original Unglued book, click here to get your copy today.

Take time to gather with a few trusted girlfriends who get your struggles and study Unglued together. Click here for more information on the Unglued Bible Study bundle.

Lysa shares more of her encouragement in the new NIV Real-Life Devotional Bible from Proverbs 31 Ministries, filled with devotions from her and the P31 Team. Click here for more information.

Reflect and Respond:
What do you need to break up with so you can connect more closely and listen more intently to God?

Write a list of things that you are placing as priorities before your time with God. Consider how you can prioritize so that God comes first, and to make sure that your time with Him isn't just another thing on your "to do" list.

Power Verses:
Jeremiah 29:13, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." (NIV)

2 Chronicles 7:14, "... if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land." (NIV)

© 2013 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
630 Team Rd., Suite 100
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org